Fun Times With Dad

my dad

I just finished a term paper, for a class that I am taking.

The topic was, How a fathers care and attention impacts a child’s life. It was based on a research article about a Fathers’ Warm Care giving.

It stated all of the obvious data, and a few new things to consider. A child fares better when there are two parents in the home. A child in a single parent situation is more likely to face poverty and the troubles associated with poverty.

A child who does not have a father in the home is more likely to become a teenage parent and more likely to indulge in drugs, alcohol, and cigarette smoking. A child without a father in the home is more likely to engage in delinquent behavior. You get it.

That is not to say that, because, a child is in a single parent home, the world is going to come crashing down on him or her. There are many fatherless families with children who turn out to be just fine, and in some cases spectacular.

This is the result of powerful parenting on the part of the mother or single father.

Sometimes there is support from friends family and the larger community.

Every now and then things turn out great because they were wonderful children anyway.

Warm parenting is described as nurturing, responsive, positive, interactions by the father.

You know, the kind of stuff you see on TV. The report studied how a father’s warm interactions with his child, between the ages of birth and age 3 affected the child in later life.

The children who had the warm interactions, whether the father was in the home or not, did better on every measure. The did better in preschool, 2 grade, 5th grade and on into adolescence and early adulthood.

This got me to thinking about how it was growing up in my nearly perfect two parent home with a stay at home mom and a kind dad who made good money and did not run the streets.

It was great. We had simple fun, if my dad mowed the lawn, I was walking in his footsteps. If my dad fixed the TV, I was hanging over his shoulder and requesting that he take out all of the scarey stuff.

When my dad put up a picket fence, I was right there, of course, the picket that I cut was totally backwards. It was so backwards that you couldn’t flip it over. So my dad used that as the interest piece on the gate.

Friday was ice cream day, it didn’t matter how many kids were on the sidewalk, we all piled in and rode to the local diary queen or we made these fantastic grape soda ice cream floats in the kitchen.

Our fun came from long rides exploring the country side. The challenge was to see how many fox you could spot. We would drive over to Drayton Plains and Watch the parachute jumpers. And we would spend long days at the state park.

It was all so simple, but so much fun. Dads, whether you are in the home or not, make it a point to spend warm, quality, simple time with your children. You can’t underestimate the impact of that.

My dad is still alive today, I am 55 he is 84.

Thanks Dad for a Wonderful Life.

It Takes A Village To Raise A Child, This Is My Village Project.

Take Care Of Your Village,

The Village Mother

The Fire Challenge

The Fire Challenge

man on fire

I learned to stay away from fire before I was 2 years old.

How old were you when you learned about fire?

I saw the craziest thing on the news recently, it is called the FIRE  CHALLENGE.

Young people were actually setting themselves ablaze and then jumping in the shower.

The news showed young kids between the age of 10 and 14 who have suffered 2nd and 3rd degree burns as a result of this challenge.

You ask yourself what has gone wrong with our children that we have to remind them that fire is dangerous?

This challenge really worried me, so I started a conversation with my 13 year old grandson. He said, “Yeah I saw that but, I didn’t want to try it”. Thank Goodness

Then he tells me that he did the snow challenge! Do you know what a snow challenge is? Well, you take off all of your clothes and jump in the snow, you stay there as long as you can. Mmm, hypothermia, frost bite, shock, and a possible loss of body parts, and this is fun?

He also told me about the salt challenge, our children need help, please talk to the young people in your life about these internet challenges.

Since I wrote this article, I have seen a shift in the application of these challenges.

The Ice challenge is a challenge of celebrities, to have a bucket of ice water dumped on their heads, each celebrity in turn challenges 3 or 4 others, they all make a donation to the ALS Charity. That is an excellent use of a dumb challenge.

It takes a village to raise a child, this is My Village Project

Take care of your village

The Village Mother

Respect and Other People’s Children

I had an encounter with a kid the other day that made me want to drag her home by her ear, and demand that the mother spank her right in front of me.

I had walked out of my front door that day to see about a half dozen neighborhood kids, climbing on top of a car. Granted that half of the kids on the car belonged to the owner of the car. I have seen this many times before and usually just give a warning to be careful.

This day I say a 12 year old neighbor from down the street, walk; from the front bumper, across the hood, over the windshield, down the back glass, and across the trunk. All of this was so that she could sit on the trunk of the car.

I said to the group in general, “does your mother know that you are walking all over her car?”, there was no response from the 10 and 12 year old kids. But, the 7 year old said just loud enough for me to hear her, erk, no one’s listening, I muttered something under my breath about a smart A** child, and continued what I was doing.

As I worked with the rear door of my car, I could hear the 7 year old, laughing in a too loud and much exaggerated manner. I ignored her, I will not engage a child, so as I prepared to leave, I promised myself that I would speak to her mother about her behavior, just as soon as I could.

The following morning the same child came to my porch to play with my 7 year old grandchild. I politely told her that because of her behavior she was not welcome at my house.

I think that I enjoyed setting her straight myself, more than I would have enjoyed talking to her mother about the situation. I have no issue with the mother, she has 2 or 3 other children who are quite polite and very well mannered.

The point is that you can get respect, without losing your cool.

Have a Great Day!